I Want Your Two Cents, Please
Good Sunday Morning to you all. In our house the Sunday Morning Show is on the tv, coffee is starting to fill our noses with aromatic smells, and the sun is jetting through our front windows. I love Sunday mornings. I hope yours is just as relaxing and even a bit nostalgic as mine is.
So, you ladies are incredibly brilliant and knowledgeable all on parts on TTC. So, I am putting this dilemma out there for your opinion. We are debuting whether to sit this cycle out or to go ahead and try. Here are the facts…..
1. V had a D & C a little over four weeks ago.
2. This is V’s first cycle since the D & C
3. The OB/GYN told us we could try after 1 cycle, until after the D & C. When I mentioned how much we spent on each cycle, she then proposed we wait 2 cycles. (So we would only wait because it might not work??)
4. If V gets pregnant this cycle then I would have 8 weeks off with the baby during the summer. Which would be AMAZING! If we wait till September cycle, then I would have roughly 5 to 6 weeks off with the baby. Which would also be great. But, we would have to put the baby in daycare a bit earlier. We are unsure what kind of time, if any, P will get off work if the baby is born during the school year.
5. If we try to early and another miscarry occurs, then we would be incredibly devastated. The miscarriage is first and most awful because of the loss of the baby. The second blow it brings is all the baby time it steals from you. Being that our first insem was in early May and here it is four months later with no baby in sight.
I really am looking forward to hearing your input!
Also rolling around in my mind is fostering. These thoughts are all very new so more on this will come later.
Having a lovely Sunday morning over here, too, thanks 🙂 I really don’t have any good advice, having extremely limited experience… I just know that people are typically told to wait at least 1 cycle after miscarrying in order for things to try to get back to normal. And I also know it hurts like hell to have to wait it out. It’s going to be difficult either way I imagine. Best of luck whatever your decision is.
Waiting 2 cycles is always what my OB recommended to let things heal and return to normal hormonally. Other people just wait 1 cycle, but my doctor was emphatic about 2. I always noticed the first cycle after a MC was lighter and just different. I wish you the best.
hmmm…i don’t really feel qualified for giving advice on such matters. but i can say what we did: we waiting the requisite time (a month for us for) and then considered (for another almost two weeks) waiting longer.
at the time of the first month’s wait being over, i thought for sure we’d wait another month. but, as time went by, i felt more and more like what i wanted was the baby and that my sadness was only going to be helped by time and a baby. and even though i didn’t feel like my body was completely back to being ready and healthy, i made the decision with my heart. i will caveat all this with the fact that i didn’t have a d&c, but i think that you should give yourself all the time you can and make a decision in the end that feels best. (it might not feel perfect, but one way may feel better for your heart or head than another…) good luck with all of this.
I think you should do whatever feels right for the both of you….either way, I wish you the best of luck.
I have to tell you that my cycles have been pretty out of whack since my m/c and it took a while for it to get back to normal. It also took me a little time to feel well enough emotionally to do it again. I had my m/c end of April and would have started again last month but there was a cyst that kept us sidelined last cycle. I think bodies do need some time to heal and get back to normal after that much trauma but you are the best judge for yourselves. Do what feels best for you and trust your instincts. Do it if it feels right, if not, it’s just one more month.
Best wishes for you no matter what you choose.
I think what’s most important is trying when YOU feel ready. Do you feel like V’s cycle was normal? Do you feel emotionally ready. I think that any insem. is a gamble, so you have to do what you feel comfortable with. In the end, most people spend so much money getting pregnant, and then on the pregnancy and baby that one extra insem won’t matter that much. If you feel like you really want to go this time and you are unsucessful, all you lose out on is a bit of money. But if you really want to go this time and SKIP this cycle, you’ll probably deal with lots of regret and “what-ifs”. I think that in the end, it’s all about doing what feels right for you.